Blindsighted

So today i got told,that how i discipline my kids isnt appropriate so they are taking Asher from us. they are looking into adoptive homes anyways,so we knew it was coming,but we to come to my house and say they are picking him up tonight,just kind of hit me hard.  Spanking my kids is innapropriate?? seriously. i have nothing else to say
-Me

Maddie Post

 This post is dedicated to Kellie Staats.  You can read her  story over at Another Day Stronger.   Today, is Kellies birthday and for her birthday she wanted people to remember her daughter. So if today, you could all just say a little prayer for Kellie, and remember her beautiful Madison

 

 Happy Birthday Kellie, continually praying for you, my heart goes out to you and your husband. I truly wish you could have what you really want for your birthday.
Love,
Me
xoxox

Current Events

So many things have happened,so many things going on, so many things coming up...
First off, i did have a vacation in July but i had brought my computer in to be fixed, and they wiped my hard drive and all my pictures and videos were gone.  i was extremely upset.  anyways, so no pictures about that. but it was a fun little vaca for me :)
The kids spent two weeks with Grandma and Grandpa vanBeek in the beginning of August. I had almost two full weeks all by myself as Hendrik was out of town for most of it as well.  I would love to tell you i got allot of my to do list done but i did not.  so i wont lie to you ;) i relaxed. and was bored.  But my kids had a great time,and that's what is important :)
On August 4th, Asher Kayden was born.

 hes been a very content and happy baby for the most part ;)

This past week,we switched him over from regular formula to soy and hes soo much happier now.  Which makes life a little bit easier on me :) My two kiddies just adore and love Asher. Every morning, Royson starts his day out with "Asher your my brother,and i love you" just melts my heart.  Shannay has a new doll apparently lol i constantly have to watch her when hes not in his crib.  she tried to be helpful,but shes really not. She means well, and shes cute,so it is wat it is :P
Last weekend we went to the Kakabaka street fair. It was fun. the kids went on a few rides (we managed to score free tickets cuz some other parent,her kids got sick and she just handed over the tickets. woo!!) Royson "stole" a ride down the slide which did give us both mini heart attacks. but go figure, he was all about the rides,we should have realized he would have made a bee line for the big slide. I would post pictures but there is quite a few and i don't know how to make them into a slide show for on here (Miranda help me out would ya? :) )
Tomorrow is Roysons open house for Junior Kindergarten.  Hes super excited to be going to school. I'm sure that will wear off once he realizes he cant actually play outside all day.  I'm a little on the fence how i feel about it, to be honest.  In one way I'm excited that hes going to school and is growing up,on the other hand, wheres my little baby boy? :( growing up way to fast. 
And that should catch you up to whats been going on in our lives. 
Anyways, time to put my little man to bed,and i WILL be back tomorrow to tell you all about his little day at his open house :). 
Until next time.
xoxo
Me

Shannay is 2!!!

                                I remember her like this like it was yesterday

                                         And now i have a full blown toddler, attitude and all!!!

How the time flies . Now we're on to potty training, and buying little panties..even tho for some odd reason she'd rather wear Roysons, Cars underwear. lol i have my work cut out with this one!! She does have her ever adorable moments tho :)

Sigh
They grow up to fast don't they?
Till next time xoxo
Me :)

Catching up :)

Wow, Easter was the last time i put up a post? *sigh* i will get more on board with this blogging thing, I'm sure of it!! ;)
Anyhow, sooo much has been going on.  I can't hardly comprehend how different our lives are about to be.  The emotions we will go through, the difficulties.  All to help out children in need.  I grew up and my parents were foster parents. I remember being greedy and asking " when are we going to be a normal family" . Now i look back and think, how selfish of me lol I guess in my mind then, i didn't like the coming and going of these kids.  And here i am, about to start on that journey again.  July 24 is the baby's due date. Sadly, she really has nobody here to go to the hospital with her when the baby is born.  So i will go, if its doable. Obviously if its a Wednesday at noon clearly I'm not taking my kids to the hospital with me. 
I'm really looking forward to starting this journey.  So many steps to be taken,so many things these people look into about your life. (sexual partners...for real, they want to know this!!) But for now, we've taken the less invasive route, called kinship care. less paper work,but the same as foster care.  Less of a home study.   In the fall we will officially be foster parents, its quite a lengthy process but apparently doing kinship care first, will help us along the way. 
Now I'm sure many people wonder why we've decided to go the route of becoming foster parents. No,its not to follow in my parents footsteps ;) although i will be looking to them for guidance in this as they've been thru it all. 
And now this post gets hard for me.
After Shannay was born, i held off on my checkup. For a year. Last July my doctor told me, or advised me rather, that i should not have more children.  The problems i had with Shannay were very hard on my body and basically, if i have another baby, i would die. I know, pretty drastic.  I struggled with this for a long time.  A very long time.  Even now i write this, teary eyed.  No more kids? really? i mean, for now, we figured we were set for kids.  Wait until they are a bit older before having another. But then to be told you cant have anymore? It was devastating for me.
Then, in November (?) I'm not sure exactly when. Someone from Hendrik's work came to him for help. His girlfriend was pregnant and he was filing for sole custody and needed someone to watch the baby for him while he was at work. Just during the day. Could we help him out? Oh could we ever!!!! I was thrilled!! newborn baby, no c section, i could sleep at night..lol it was almost as good as having my own!!(OK not quite ) Anyways, obviously its not working out quite as he wanted and hes kind of not so involved. anyways, that's a whole other story that I'm not sure I'm even allowed to talk about. 
So, basically, if i cant have more children, and there are others out there having kids and cant care for them, I'll do it. Gladly.  Any child that comes into my home,will be loved and treated like one of my own. And I'm aware that these children are not mine to keep, and may end up leaving my home.  Being the emotional person that i am, i know i will have a hard time when that time comes.
All in all we're going to need many prayers and support through all this.  As I'm sure we will be getting.
To end this post i am going to post some pictures, as I'm feeling sentimental <3

 The day before Shannay was born.  I have no pictures of me pregnant with royson as i felt like a big ol cow. lol Hind sight. i wish i had some. 

My babies the day they were born <3

Yes he is wearing the same shirt with both kids. Totally unplanned,but funny when we realized it :)

                                                                 Oh how i love these two <3

I'm sure i could post so many pictures on how similar these two are. I'll save that for another blog post :)
Till next time :) xoxo
Me :)

Start em young ;)

Hello!!  This is going to be a very quick post, as i have company over :) There will be pics and stuff on that on Monday..ish.  I will leave you with this video, Enjoy!! We were all sitting around chatting after supper on Friday,and Royson must have been bored or just wanted to be helpful :))  Either way, it was great!!

Until next time :)

Accidents Happen

Saturday started out like a normal day. Then got boring. very boring. i didn't have the energy for much that day. We got groceries and went to the dollar store. After dinner,Hendrik had gone out, and i was sitting at my laptop when suddenly Shannay was next to me screaming her head off,blood oozing down her face. Immediately my heart stopped, i grabbed her and stuffed a towel on her face. At that point she got mad, because she hates having anything on her face. Somehow (and we still aren't sure how) she managed to get a deep gash on the bridge of her nose. Once her face was cleaned up,she said "Owie Mommy!!! now play" Stinker. At that point i figured shed be OK,but the cut looked deep so i thought better get Hendrik home and take her to the Emergency. When i actually dialed Hendriks number, it was at that point that i broke down, i remember saying something about come home now, hospital, and Shannay, in between crying. When we got to the hospital, Shannay was all pro, finger in the little thing to get her heart beat, and even let the nurse put the hospital bracelet on her. "Pitty mommy!!"

Then the even harder part came. The Dr. came in to see her, said she would need stitches. (Again, not a good moment for me ;) lol ) Now, she wanted to play,she wanted to jump on the bed, and we had to hold a cotton ball with freezing gel on her face for 20 minutes. Not. Happening!! Try one-Hendrik hold her i hold her hands. No go. worked for about 3 minutes. Try Two- i hold her, Hendrik holds her hands. She cried (screamed) and i sang. the only song i could think of at that moment. Klappes in je Handjes. she couldn't clap, or move or anything, but she calmed down, got froze, and got stitched.

All said and done, i have one brave little girl, and stitches, didn't slow her down, one little bit :)